You know when a person laughs so hard to a point where you can barely hear what they are saying?
That’s what I woke up to this morning, a phone call from my friend reminding me of something that happened almost three years ago. A friend was looking for a boyfriend and my friend being the match maker that she is decided to took that upon herself and fix this other friend of ours with another guy friend of ours who was also in the market.
Now fast forward to the meeting day between the two, I had to be the lucky one – third wheeler who turned into moral supporter as my friend the matcher-maker was out of town. It’s funny now but nothing about it was funny when it happened. Guy sees girl and guys text me, “not my cupp-a , I am sorry won’t be able to stay beyond ten minutes I will settle the bill on my way out” .There I was with girl who believed that guy went to the gents,problem was ,it’s now twenty minutes since he had gone to the ‘bathroom’ I am now slowly running out of things to say. Had nodded a countless times to how good he looked and how great they were going to be together, even came up with possible names for their first born baby what now?
Forty five minutes down I continue to pacify, Girl seems to be enjoying her Savannah…until.
“Friend didn’t he say he was going to the gents?”
“Mmmhh I think he kind of mentioned that he had to run somewhere”
My face sells me out as usual, girl barrages the brassiest shriek I have ever witnessed ever.
If I didn’t know any better, I swear I would have believed that Girl was the inventor of a heart break, she cried like she was the creator of pain. I mean I have heard story of women being left at the altar, custom made dresses flown from Paris, most expensive bouquet and all, but no guy.Girls who stood by guys when they had nothing with the hope that once they make it, they will be the obvious choice but no cigar. To cry over a supposedly match making gone bad …NEVER.
“Is there something wrong with me?” she asked.
To cry a river though at a possibility of dating someone?? I know my heart turned into a stone like ages ago. We all have an explanation for every bad relationship we’ve been through, the kind of story that will have people sympathising and offering box of tissues in support, to a point where we believe ours to be the exception to the rules of love. Oh please!!!. This dating/Love thing only a few can claim to have it all figured out no amount of obsessing over it will make it any different. It’s time for women to free themselves from all the blame, to stop pointing the finger at the man, the situation, and move on.
The sad thing is some women believe the best way to move on is to pretend they never got hurt in the first place.You also get those who are so relationship obsessed, trying to force love because they can’t live without a man, Some put caution tape around their heart, and give up on love.
Giving up on Love…Really?
Act like a boy…waste of energy.
I sat at that restaurant that Saturday afternoon not know what to tell girl. A big part of me wanted to tell her to put on her big girl panties when she was done crying, and get her head back to the game. See there is no full proof emotional safety net, it’s all about knowing thy self, flaws and all. We live in a world where the only person you can rely on to pick you up is YOU. You must go through pain in order to conquer your fear, and in the end fire forges steel, not hugs.
I sent a text to guy later that Saturday “Dude you could have had the decency to tell her that it was never going to work, man up and face her instead of leaving me to do it for you” He scribbled a lot of BS about how he had dated a similar model looking girl before and how bad it ended.
I have heard man on some…
I am damaged…Really?
I can’t trust women…Really?
“Women are all the same , they are all out to hurt me, therefore I will hurt them before they hurt me…Blah blah blah .Grow up already will you?To let one woman back into your heart is to let all women back into your heart, and you cannot allow that because you cannot recover from another heartache…Come on!!!. Man be hiding from love as if they are above Love.
I am not a man, maybe I am better off staying clear of talking to men or about men, but hey I have friends and cousins and I have seen how bad man are at choosing women. Of course I don’t know what is it that they go for. I have heard some say they are just looking for a good women. What is good? Isn’t good idiosyncratic? Some will tell you that all they want is a safe women, one that will not argue and try to wear pants (whatever that means).Choosing a women because you think that they are a safe option is the most defeating thing that you can ever do to thy self. (sendtshilo) Men be choosing women who keep dropping lemons for them, how much lemonade can you make out of that before you run out of sugar? We get it men can’t open up and be all emotional, but ya’all better be true to yourselves.It’s okay nearly every man walking this earth has chased a whale that couldn’t be caught, attempted to climb a mountain that sent him crashing it’s all part of life.
Dudes please get over yourselves already quit being the reflection of the women who broke you.while you are in the process of discovering your Ms Right do that wisely. I understand that an exciting woman can make time stand still and feels better emotionally than any boring yet sweet woman. She was special, she was beautiful, she felt like a once in a lifetime catch, but her positives will never outweigh her negatives, now reflect the lessons learned from that experience, develop the ability to see who is truly Ms Right for you…
Merry Christmas everyone…